Sunday, May 8, 2022

Some of the Happy News


Selamat Hari Raya Idul Fitriii~~

Here are some of the bright news coming from my scholarship and master application..

Dear God is the greatest for me.. Allah allowed me to try harder on the scholarship interview process. On the last week of Ramadhan, LPDP give me a good news about passing my TBS score. 

Moreover, I got my Unconditional Offer at UCL, my dream campus just right before Idul Fitriii~

I also have to submit my portfolio for UAL admission!

Well, please wish me luck for this opportunity~  

I will always depend on God for  my life guide and I hope I can be closer with my inner peace, while trying hard for the opportunities.

I will be more depend on my closest people, especially my family in order to gain my confidence... 

Please wish me luck in everything I try to do now~~

Wednesday, March 30, 2022

My Failures

 I know I will receive rejection email as I apply to many kind of scholarship.

I don't know how much I can bear to hear the bad result. 

But every time I feel down, I'm back to read books, telling stories to my closest people, and writing in any media 

Every time I receive the note of failure, I hesitates to walk further. I can't really accept it and admit that I have so many flaws. I even really scared to receive criticism from stranger. To the point I'm afraid showing off my self to the social media. To the point I sometimes feels jealous over people's achievements... 

I need to reflect on this matters, I need to evaluate myself to gain more life experiences.. 

I will exercise myself to receive more failures in order to be strong. 

Here are my failures in this first quarter of 2022

I hope, really hope that I learn a lot from this experiences...

Monday, March 14, 2022

Catatan Kecil


Bila ingin hidup damai di dunia
Bahagialah dengan apa yang kau punya
Walau hatimu merasa
Semua belum sempurna sebenarnya
Kita sudah cukup semuanya
Bila dunia membuatmu kecewa
Karna semua cita-citamu tertunda
Percayalah segalanya
Telah diatur semesta
Agar kita mendapatkan yang terindah
Impianmu terbangkanlah tinggi
Tapi slalu pijakkan kaki di bumi
Senyumlah kembali
Bahagiakan hari ini
Buatlah hatimu bersinar lagi
Bila ingin lebih damai di dunia
Berbagilah bahagia yang tlah kau punya
Kini hatimu terasa
Semua lebih sempurna
Karena kau hidup
Dengan seutuhnya
Impianmu terbangkanlah tingi
Tapi slalu pijakkan kaki dibumi
Senyumlah kembali
Bahagiakan hari ini
Buatlah hatimu bersinar lagi
Bila ingin lebih damai di dunia
Berbagilah bahagia yang tlah kau punya
Percayalah segalanya
Telah diatur semesta
Agar kita mendapatkan yang terindah
Kini hatimu terasa
Semua lebih sempurna
Karena kau hidup
Dengan seutuhnya

Saturday, March 5, 2022

Money Money...

Since I resigned from my full time job, I listed all of the future important expenses that I need in order to support process of my self-development. 

Almost all of them were checked! ✅✅✅

I just need additional 12-15 million Rupiahs in order to buy a brand new laptop 😭😭

Let's work hard!!

Please pray for my future.. 
I need another 20 million Rupiahs to support my future education πŸ₯ΊπŸ₯ΊπŸ₯Ί

Let alone marriage, I need to fulfill this dream first...


Monday, February 7, 2022


 Dear God, 

This year I want a fresh start in my career and my life. I want to explore Your creations in this world, I want to learn more, I want to grow love for myself. I want to be a great example for my students. I want to be great children for my parent. I want to give my best contribution as a human and Your ummat. 

Dear God, 

If I don't start my master and scholarship this year, please guide me to your other best scenario. You have the best decision to my life. As a human, I have my own limitation. The only thing I can do right now is to give my best effort to every path that I see in front of me. 

If I failed this year and no campus or scholarship that allow me to study my master degree, please give a bigger space for my heart. I am only a human that often hurt by my own expectation. I know and give You my trust that You will give me the best scenario in my life. 

I don't have any wish for this year except that I want a fresh start of my career and my life. I am ready to fight. I am willingly to do anything in order to give myself a new chance. Please give me courage to start all over again. If the fresh start does not mean master degree and scholarship, please give me a clear direction. 

Dear Allah, 

I just want to start my own independent journey. 

Please give me courage to be my own self. Please give me courage to start my own initiative.

Wednesday, January 5, 2022

Finally I Achieve my First 7.0 Band IELTS Test

 Helloo~ I will share my experience how to achieve 7.0 for IELTS score

Its my 4th time of IELTS test and every time I went to the test I always anxious about my writing and speaking. I always aimed to get at least 6.5, with no score under 6.0. With my capability, I can get 'okay' result, but sometimes one of them only have 5.5 or overall score only 6.0. 

There are many kind of IELTS course that I joined in span of 7 years, only to get into master degree and scholarship. Seven years of struggling and 4 times real test. Only two of them I get 6.5 and 7.0. Finally I got the pattern of how I study IELTS/.

Here are the courses that I joined before and my honest review: (Jakarta, Depok and Pare based)


EF Depok - IELTS Intensive - about 4-5 months, fee between IDR 2000K-3000K

They gave us really great overall view about IELTS Test but I find it hard to get individual review. 


TEST Pare Kampung Inggris - IELTS 1 month Intensive - IDR 1000K

Its like an eye-opener for me to join them. I spend only one month but feels like 1 year staying there. I have to spend my time in a dorm learning english all day. The morning class start at 5.30 AM πŸ’€πŸ’€ and night class ended at 9.00-10.00 PM. But I really love all the curriculum, schedule, and classmate. I get to know all the theories to the specific tips from them. All in~! After join them I got my IELTS done with 6.5 score overall.


LBI UI - Academic English or IELTS (?) I forgot, fee between IDR 1000K-2000K

I joined this only to upgrade my academic english but I feels like I did not really click with the lessons.


Private Online IELTS Writing Feedback - 1 month - IDR 500K

Hemm its not really good experience for me because I couldnt catch up with daily tasks and my email stucked at his spam folder. Sooo  did not get full review and there were no class interaction between peers.


Bel*ajar ID IELTS Writing - Online Whatsapp, below IDR 200K

Sadly I cant even remember what I learned here... I was really stress with work at that time. I couldnt even get the accepted IELTS score at that time


My Skill ID IELTS Intensive Class - Online Zoom 1 month - IDR 1000K 

Only 10 times online class but its worth the price. I got 7.0 band and I think its also because I really want to push myself this time

I can say that the study time, consistency and have study partner is really important. 

The amount time you spend is not really affected the result, but its crucial to have effective exercise. 

I always use Cambridge IELTS as they have the most similar test package to the real one. They have 16 books and you can find the PDF easily on the internet. The listening part also on Youtube. You just have to type the specific test package, for instance: Cambridge 15-1, Cambridge 14-3. In one book, they have 4 test packages, include academic and general. 

I prepare IELTS Test about 3 month:

First month is for refreshing the general type questions and grammar, also useful tips that cover all of questions type. Usually I have to join group or pay for a class for this 1 month. After the class ended, I made a self-assessment and start to apply for the real test. That way I can settle up without postponed too far from the initial plan.

The next month, I got to drill the Cambridge books, but a bit slower to understand where I usually have my mistakes and try to watch Youtube videos or listening to British podcast about different topics. This month I'm learning by myself so I have to be strict with schedule:

*Listening - 40 min + 10 min (5.00 -6.00 AM)

*Reading - 60 min + 10 min (6.00-7.00 AM)

*Speaking - 15min + 10 min (after 4.00 PM or after 8.00 PM)

*Writing - 60 min + 10 min (only 2-3 a week)

-NB: last 10 min for making note/reminder and self-review

of course I did not really following the plan but at least it help me to figuring out my schedule (I also working full time) 

The last month before test, I find a study partner who can review my speaking or writing privately because its my weaknesses. Not to forgot also to keep drilling the practice books until I satisfied. I usually get to do listening and reading in the morning (I spend only 2 hours everyday) and writing/speaking 2-3 times a week (depend on revewer's schedule. If I need more opinion then I ask more than 1 reviewer. I really grateful to have friends who are willing to do that for me 😊😊

Here is my plan: 

I made this plan before join online zoom class. At first I aimed to have 7.5 band score even though I only need 6.5. I planned higher band in order to give more space to failure(?) in case I have difficulties in real test, at least I prepare the higher band when I'm practicing. 

On the other note, I really enjoyed computer based test! 

Maybe because I often write on the dekstop in my last practice month and feel awkward when I'm writing by hand. Its really convenient because I can hear the listening section clearly also the reading part I just need to scroll down for each part. 

Here is my detailed score:

- Reading 7.5
- Listening 7
- Writing 6.0
- Speaking 6.5

So overall 7.0 😊😊😊

I hope I can use this IELTS result for the better opportunity in achieving my higher education πŸ˜†
Please pray for me too~ 
Friend who want to get your IELTS may you get the best score

Sunday, January 2, 2022

Welcome 30!!


Yesterday is my 30th birthday.
I've been really anxious how my 30 will become
I think I was anxious because of my own expectation

Should people in their 30 get married?
Should people in their 30 have a stable career?
Should people in their 30 have a high income?

Am I should be sad if I can't achieve those yet?

I am tired of expectations yet I believe that I am capable of handle my own business
I'm imagining myself I will be an inspirator and influencer someday
and I'm proud that I can achieve it bit by bit 
I've been contributed to some of the environmental projects along with NGO and government institutions
I also created activities in communities.. 

I hope that I can achieve my long dream this year to pursue my master degree
Please please let it happen... 

I can only hope it will be my last chance to give all of my energy 

Maybe I can get married peacefully after pursuing my master degree πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ‘€πŸ˜Ή

Lastly, thank youuu for all of my besties who write wishes for my birthdayy


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